Thursday, April 7, 2022

Question Number #2


Can I just say that I am terribly sorry for taking so long to get to all of the questions asked?  I am trying to keep up, but I took on a little much trying to help coach this spring and it is taking any extra time I had to post regularly.  That being said we only have another three weeks left in the season and then life will calm down some.  Well, it will calm down enough that posting regularly can begin again.  Until then I ask you have patience as muddle through and try to put my fingers to the keyboard as often as I can.  Now, onto Roz's questions.


Hi Baker,

Great questions from Morningstar! I'm curious too as to how ttwd has benefited your relationship.

How do you manage to juggle life with your large brood and stay sane lol. Seriously though, how do you manage to incorporate ttwd with a house full.

Lastly, a fun, non-ttwd question. Bucket list place to visit.

Hugs

Roz

Now, Roz, is one of those who knows a bit more about our personal life as through the years we have exchanged emails and the like.  So, I know, when I say life is crazy busy she really knows I am NOT exaggerating.  I think I occasionally share with my friends my daily to do list, but I won't bore everyone with that, but I know Roz often tells me how amazed she is that we do TTWD at all.  I know we manage best when Hoss is HOHing, and I am TiHing.  LOL, that was fun to write!  So let me see if I can sort of explain how things work around here.

Now, How do we juggle it all?  

My Answer: We don't.  I needs lots of sleep since the stroke and even to a degree before I had the stroke, so mornings depend on if my brain wakes up enough before Hoss has to leave for work.  Mornings are the best time as we tend to wake up around 5 and it's rare for any of our kids to be up before 6.  Hoss was just commenting the other day that we needed to find a time to reconnect.  To us reconnect means some sex and some sort of spanking, but it also just mean times alone together, if that makes sense.  We value these times in the whirlwind of raising kids and know that they are vital to our marriage.  Also reconnecting keeps things consistent and stable and peaceful in the day to day chaos with so many people and things to manage.  For us keeping God at the forefront of our marriage is our sanity.


Now spanking can be a bit of fun, but typically it is a reset or discipline.  Pretty much the only way spanking can happen is the kids need to be in another part of the house or sleeping or gone.  Rarely, and I mean rarely, do we have the house to ourselves so the other two situations apply most often.  Hoss also tends to play the news as an additional background noise to block out any adverse sounds.  We still use Bertha if the kids are sleeping, but during the day it just depends.  I hate quiet implements like Loopy or a plastic hanger, but they do work when Hoss needs to get his point across and there is no other alternative available that would keep things relatively quiet.  


But TTWD, DD, etc. is not just about spanking or having a better sex life.  It's about showing mutual love and respect to one another.  We live that right out in front of everyone.  Our kids know that Hoss is in charge, and I am second in command.  We live our lives with God at the head, so for us it's Biblical truths that we try to live out in front of our family.  We want them to understand that God is the one we follow our example from and run our home accordingly.  


I submit and Hoss leads.  Is that consensual?  Yes.  We both want it this way and before when we were "doing it the way the world suggests" we were utterly failing in so many ways.  Hoss often says that this relationship gave him his voice back.  I equate that to saying it gave him his manhood back.  I was slowly stripping away the way he saw himself by my own attitude and disrespect for him.  That was not right and I definitely regret how I treated him early on in our marriage.  The peace we have now, makes the sacrifices well worth it.  I will add here that we have to work hard to keep things consistent.  We are BUSY and as I've heard recently, whatever is important to you, you'll make time to make it a priority.  Hoss and our marriage is a priority in our home.  

Now, on to a less serious topic and gets me of my personal soapbox.  

Bucket list place to visit?


Ah, my friend, I want to visit you and Lindy of course down under!  Also, Alaska.  Hoss and I both love snow and mountains.  

Okay, here's to hoping I get to PK's questions for Monday's post!

Have a great rest of your week and weekend!

--Hoss and Baker

2 comments:

  1. Hi Baker,

    Please don't apologise. As you said in this post, I do often comment that I don't know how you manage to post lol. We are here as and when you are able. You should definitely never feel pressure to post.

    Thank you for answering my questions. I absolutely love your answer to my first question. How you show your mutual love and respect and that the kids know Hoss is in command (as it were).

    Your answer to my second question is so sweet. I would absolutely love that! Wouldn't it be so awesome to actually meet face to face. Even better, you, Lindy and I sipping wine together:)

    Funny you should mention Alaska. For some reason I have always wanted to do an Alaskan cruise. Well, I've gone off the idea of cruises a little over the last couple of years lol.

    Hugs
    Roz

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  2. Sounds like you guys are going a great job. It's so easy to let the relationship slip because everything else has a time table - Hoss has to go to work, coaching is on a time table, but you can do the relations stuff 'later.' You are paying attention and that's great.

    As for that trip 'down under' I'll sat THAT would be a hoot. I hope you all make it one of these days.

    PK

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