50

 

Fifty is a bad number.  Fifty is not fun.  Fifty is unfair.   I do not like fifty.  It seems, well, dramatic.  Or maybe it makes me feel dramatic.  It just seems like a big number   with lots of implications.

No, I am not turning nifty fifty.  Neither is Hoss.  So what does fifty have to do with this post?  Ugh, I know most of you have figured it out by now.

I had fifty coming and Hoss was not going to let me out of it.  We had been sick so this fifty was hanging over my head for several days.  I had given him a few dirty looks, some snide remarks and I'm pretty sure I rolled my eyes when I should have been listening to whatever he was saying.  In other words, my attitude was not what it should have been and he warned me where I was headed.  He felt those responses needed fixing especially when he had given me chances to fix it.  Anyone else know where this is heading?  

He waited until I came to him and let him know I felt well enough to accept my swats.  They were not soft swats, not overly hard.  All were deserved.  I was emotional and tired and yes, I had tears in my eyes.   It hurt even though he gave them in ten swat increments.  

Bertha spoke loud and clear.  Do NOT have an attitude with Hoss.  I got the message.  And now I feel better.  

Hugs and being held.  Sweet reassurance.

No more waiting for fifty.

Just relaxed.  Feeling loved.

Now, how was your weekend?

--Baker

Obey

I am here to tell you folks, obedience is a nice long word.  Obedient is only slightly smaller.  But they both mean one must obey.  Why do I struggle with that little word, sometimes?  I sure would love to know.

This morning (Wednesday) as Hoss was leaving for work he gave me a sweet, warm bear hug.  I love his hugs.  As I turned to walk away he gave me two soft swats on my nightgown clad bottom.  "Obey," was all he said before releasing me.  Who else gets those little flutters in their tummy when their man says to, "Obey?"  I smiled to myself, promising myself that I would do just that.  To Hoss I mumbled an, "Okay," or a "Yes," I truly do not remember.  I was too caught up in my own mind about that little word.

Later this morning Hoss and I were texting back and forth about a meal I was preparing for a friend of his from work.  I was going on and on about what my ideas were and his reply...Pick three things.  That's all that is needed.  He reminded me that I had been having a lot of foggy brain this week and I was setting myself up for failure.  His little pats on my bottom and telling me to obey came screaming back to my head.  Obey.  Such a tough tough word.

He was right of course.  Be careful and gentle with myself.  It also means I obey him.  But I wrestle with this.  I want to.  I desire to.  My human nature is to just fight against him.  There isn't a reason those feelings pop out.  He is seriously trying to make life easier for me.  Just trying to work through those feelings.  Submit.  Obey.  That's what I need to do.  Just pray I can do it.  Does anyone else struggle like this?  Can I be the only one?

--Baker

Let's Recap, Shall We?

So, the other day, I was bemoaning in my latest post that I was feeling like we were in a bit of a desert simply because there were no spankings to be had.  In our home, we have a definite hard and fast rule.  I am not allowed to post anything without Hoss' permission when it comes to this blog.  It's for our own safety.  Always put an extra set an eyes on what I write before I post it.  Occasionally, that comes back to bite me in the butt.

Let's recap, shall we?

My latest post had to do with feeling like I was definitely lacking in the spanking arena.  Hoss and I had both been sick and even though we were sick, I was craving a reset.  Well, in order to share with you all my dilemma, I had to share the post with Hoss first.  

Let's recap his reaction, shall we?

He began to read in earnest as he almost always does.  My man is very sweet and supportive of this blog.  He also wants to make sure we do our best to present DD in a way that helps or teaches others.  We also want to be authentic.  Show our readers the real us as best as we can, without necessarily oversharing.  So, Hoss picks up my laptop and is reading away.  When he sets it down he chuckles.  I look up from my side of the bed.  "What's up?  Did you like it?"  He grins.  "Oh, we will definitely be taking care of that."  I smiled and we left it at that.  We were both worn out.  Kids were still up.  It was not going to happen right then, and probably not even that night and we both knew it.

Let's recap when it did happen, shall we?

The next morning, as Hoss was getting dressed for work, he beckoned me to him.  It was early, my brain was not in first gear yet, so of course I went to him.  "Let's take care of that post," he said sweetly.  "Huh, what??? Now?" Of course now.  That makes perfect sense, right?  I shook my head and he gestured to the bed.  

Let's recap the spanking, shall we?

I leaned over the bed, praying.  Yes, praying because I needed this.  Praying because I didn't expect this right now.  Praying because I really really want the release from this reset.  Hoss begins swatting with his right hand.   I am clinching my eyes and breathing through each swat.  Hard and steady swats.  A few dozen swats and we are done.  He pulls me up in a hug and a kiss.  "All better?" he asks.  I smile.  Of course, I'm all better!  It's what I needed.  I know what keeps me even keel.  Hoss smiled back.  I love that smile of his.  "All better?" he asks.  "Yup," came my reply.  We share a hug.

Let's recap why this works, shall we?

Because my husband knows me.  Sometimes I need to ask for it and I don't.  Sometimes I ask for it and he cannot deliver immediately, but he still takes care of me as soon as he can.  We know what works for us.  This works for us.  From the acknowledgement that I was in need to the delivery to the sweet touches afterward.  This is a dance that we choose to move to.  And it serves us well.

--Baker

Let's Talk About Spanking...

Did you read the title of my post?  I so want to talk about spanking with you, guys.  I do.  I am feeling very deprived right now.  Hoss has been sick for almost two weeks (and he felt the need to share) and other than the few swats I got the other day there has been NO spanking at our house.  

No, I am not joking.  Well, three light playful swats in the bed the other night, but that's all.  I mean we are in a drought here, people.  I may just about dry up and wilt away in this desert.  I know we are sick with this nasty junk, but come on here.  Seriously!  How in the world are we going to survive?  Should I go on?  I really could, but you get the gist of it.

Whew!  That felt good to get out my system.  Meltdown was so close to happening here.  I'm strung out on these steroids, and if Hoss wasn't gone most of the day working in his office, I do believe there would be spankings anew every hour of every day.  I am good like that, friends.  It is a refined skill at doing my best to be submissive and falling short at just about every turn.  It's just so easy to get into trouble, and at times, so difficult to stay out of it.  It's not always like that.  I have been known to be good, but right now my insides are all twisted about and I just need something to right my mind.  To get my emotions back into check.

I think I'm a spanko, but only when it comes to playful swats and such.  When it comes to the heavy stuff like being spanked for sass aka attitude, well, I'm a wimp anymore.  I'm begging to be let off before the spanking begins.  Is anyone else like that?  All too big for your britches until things take a nasty turn and your man starts throwing implements out onto the bed.  All that attitude melts like butter on a piece of toast and my sass starts to melt right along with it.

It's just the whole loss of not being spanked.  It is so hard when I'm used to it.  I mean, this probably is not even making sense, and maybe it's the meds talking, but I need a reset something awful, people.  I know it does not make sense, but it does.  When I get all wound tight like this, that's what I crave.  The worst part is that Hoss is the one that gives the spankings.  DUH!  And he really is not up to it right now.  I need a hug.  And a spanking.  Anyone else out there with me?

--Baker

I Heard You, NOT!

So Hoss told me to write this post.  So I did or rather I am.  Apparently, he feels, that yours truly has a slight problem.  I, personally, do not think I have a problem at all.  Alas, I will share with you, are lovely readers, and let you decide if this problem even exists or not.  (Okay, I know it does, but I still find it terribly hard to admit, even to myself).

Hoss had some time off between Christmas and New Year's in which he spent doing a great many projects around the house.  He returned to work, just to come home to quarantine a few days later.  Now, he is under the weather, but not to the degree that he is sick in bed kind of sick.  He's basically spent the few days catching up on some rest, bingeing his favorite shows and cleaning our room from top to bottom.  There is the basic storyline or set up for what is going on.  Are you ready for the issue at hand?  The problem, not problem?  Yeah, me too.  Here goes.

On several occasions, over the past two few weeks, Hoss has made the comment that Bertha needs to make an appearance for one reason or another.  I smile brightly at these times and change the subject as quickly as I can.  However, Hoss cannot be deterred from the conversation.  He will lead the conversation straight back to Bertha.  I cannot imagine why he thinks I'm not listening.  I'm listening aplenty, I just do not want to be...um...adjusted (in attitude that is.)  This whole discussion has not been said because I'm in trouble, but more because a reset is needed or Hoss just feels like I need a few swats to keep me in check.  Or maybe it is because I am teetering on the line of trouble, but we all know what an angel I am, so I hardly think that is the actual goal he has in mind.

Now, personally, I believe that Bertha deserves a better home.  Someone's home in which she could be out on display for some other housewife to glare at.  Bertha cannot like the dark safe she hides in, can she?  I mean, after all these years, you would think I would find someone out there who longs for a Bertha of their own.

Sorry, I got a bit distracted.  So on these occasions that Hoss has suggested that Bertha make an appearance and I have tried to avoid the topic all together.  I'm sure no one out there will believe that I can do a lot of quick talking to move the conversation away from Bertha or spanking in general.  I mean I am a self proclaimed spanko, but that gleam in Hoss' eye always makes me weary.  He has a definite love love relationship with Bertha.  I, on the other hand, prefers Bertha to stay away.  I mean a hand spanking most days will do the trick to warm me up, but Bertha is more a staple in, Keep-Baker-In-Line, kind of spanking, and well, that's not my favorite kind of spanking.

 A good example of one of these little talks went similar to what follows:

"Hey, honey, what did you call me in here for?"

"Can you sort out that mail for me?"  Hoss says nicely.  He had been sorting mail for awhile, trying to weed out what we could shred from last year and the pile was small considering all that he had been sorting through.  I, sort of, probably, rolled my eyes.  He frowned, but ignored me.

I quickly sorted out the mail and handed him the shred pile and took the mail we needed to save to the keep pile.  As I turned to walk away he asked me about another pile.  Now, my feathers were getting ruffled a bit.  I mean, he had kind of interrupted me, and I really do not being side tracked even for a good reason.  My attitude was really started to rear it's ugly head.  Maybe more than I realized.

"You know, I have realized that NO one can really hear me in here when the door is closed."  Hoss said rather matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, I kind of noticed that too."  I knew what he was hinting at.  "You haven't tested your theory yet."  

He shrugged his shoulders a bit.  Obviously, not concerned about sound traveling whatsoever.  I made a face.  I know I did.  He made a face back.  One that indicated that I was over the line....Maybe I should not have said that.  I backed up.  So what did I say to help the situation?  I said, "I heard you, not."  This was said in teasing.  I understood what he was saying, even though he had not said a word.  It was my way of trying to lighten the mood.  Seeing that tactic did not improve his facial expression or body language I made an excuse and left abruptly.  

Well, being quarantined sure was not helped his spanking me desire.  He actually looked rather determined to spank me with Bertha with everyone home on the theory we would not be heard.  I knew I had trouble hearing him call out from the next room, and Hoss does not have a quiet voice.  Eek!  This was looking like a possibility.  

A short time later I ventured into our room again.  Testing the waters so to speak.  "Can you help me decide what to do with these books?"

"Sure," I said.  Hoss then proceeded to try to talk to me about something or other and midway through the sentence I finished his sentence.  Oh, my will I ever ever learn?  There was that frown again.  He started to say something again and what did I do?  Do we really need to say?  "I know, I know, I'm not supposed to interrupt you again."  UGH!  I did it again.  I did not let him get a word in edgewise.  His face turned a bit red and he closed his lips tightly together.  "I heard you, not."  What the heck?  I might have just signed, sealed and delivered my butt for Bertha.

Thankfully, Hoss is a gracious husband.  He just used his hand this time.  But I will definitely try a lot harder to not say, "I heard you."  

So, "Yes, Hoss, I heard you."  Loud and clear.  But I know there will come a time (and there already has) that what will cross my mind.  When I will think, "I heard you, I heard you not.".

--Baker

I'd Like to Know...

There are so many things I would like to know about other taken in hand wives.  Believe it or not, at this time, most of the things I talk about with friends that blog are not about DD even though that's how our friendships began.  

I have learned the answers to some of these thoughts from some of their blogs or maybe at some point in conversation, but I'd almost like to take a poll and see what they have to say now as many have been blogging for a long time....But it's not just bloggers who make me ponder, but my readers as well.  I mean these question pertain to all of us living or interested in this lifestyle.  The thoughts below are random in their listing, just pick one or two and share your thoughts.  Let's get talking people!

How come we all enjoy spanking?  Was it a life long desire or something you stumbled upon?  Did your spouse bring it to you?  How or why does this become such an overwhelming need within us?

Why is it that some of us fight the need to cry?  I know for years I did.  Since I was sick I can cry at the drop of the hat.  But for years I would not cry.  I wanted to or said I did, but when push came to shove I mentally fought back.  Why is that?  Does anyone have any theories?

Does anyone have any ways to keep your mouth from speaking crazy random things that keep you out of trouble?  Like how do you keep yourself from saying things that make it worse?  There are times I just cannot help myself and have to get the last word or speak over my man without thinking?  Do I truly lack that much impulse control?  Am I that ignorant?  I choose not to believe either of those, yet there are days I just shake my head at myself and wonder when I will choose not to poke the bear.  

Why do we enjoy that after spanking feeling?  That tenderness that may last for a few hours or a day or two after a well spanked bottom?  What is it about that feeling that makes me feel so loved and cherished?  Why will we sacrifice our butts and upper thighs for that feeling?  I often really wonder about that because in the moment of a well deserved spanking, I truly just have no idea how I got into this lifestyle in the first place.

Lastly, why do certain implements do it for some, but not for others?  Why do I loathe Loopy, but can tolerate Bertha?  Why does leather make most of us fear and tremble and also make us puddle at the same time.  There is just so much that we can take with one implement, but could take another all day long.  Is it physiological or physical or mental or spiritual?  I wonder what the thoughts or emotions are behind it all?  And why do their hands just seem so hard and callous one minute and so soft and gentle the next?

So, below, feel free to answer.  I know some of you are not bloggers, but you are into DD and I just really am curious how you would answer these questions.  Feel free to let me know in the comments below or if you'd prefer an email.  Help answer my questions and ease my thoughts that I am not alone in my wondering.

--Baker

Sometimes We Need to Remember

Sometimes when you are in the middle of something you do not always understand how it can impact your life.  Like when we began DD we were just going to give it a try.  See how we liked it.  See if it even suited us.  Hoss was reluctant to even spank at all for discipline when we began.  I'm curious how many other HOH's were like that in the beginning, but now fully embrace the lifestyle.  I'm also interested on who has tried this lifestyle out and decided it was not for them and why.  No shame either way, just curiosity on my end.  Anyway, on to today's little memory.

The other day, I came down to our bedroom to see Hoss for some reason or other.  He had that silly grin he gets on his face that made me grin back.  I love our relationship.  It definitely suits us.  We may not be very heavy DD like some or as light as others, but how we do marriage fits us well.   Now, where exactly was I going with all of this?

Yes, Hoss and his mischievous grin.  I walked over to that sweet man and gave him a hug.  He hugged me right back.  I pulled away and went to grab something out of my purse that was sitting on the bed.  I know better.  He was too close.  Hand and bum connected several times until I was almost out of breath!  I tend to hold my breath when he swats though I have no idea why.  Hoss finally let me up.  I turned around rubbing my bum.  That man had a Cheshire cat's grin from ear to ear!

"Are you quite finished?"  I said in righteous indignation?   (Okay, Okay!  I admit it!  I loved every second of it!  Playful fun and all!)

"I don't think so.  I think I've got a lot more where that came from."  Hoss said as he came towards me.  I backed up, giggling the whole way.  He had me pinned against the bedroom door in no time.  He wrapped his arms around me and began squeezing my hind cheeks hard.  "No, I think, we need some more of this!"  

Kissing me hard on the lips I felt ready for anything.  That sweet man could have practically did anything and I would have been mush in his hands.  He undid my jeans and then and slid my panties down.  

"You aren't going anywhere now."  

Those words had me.  That smile had me.  Before I knew it we were having some very nice "exercise."  Read sex, but we call it exercise.  I cannot exactly remember why, but I'm pretty sure it's because of the kids.  It's not like we can outright say, "Mom and Dad need to go have sex now, you run along..." can we?

Now, these are the types of things people who are not in this lifestyle do not understand about DD.  This is what it's about.  It's not just discipline and spanking and corner time.  It's not all about rules and consequences or always about submission and obedience.  Though it is also about those things, just not always.  It's about using this tool to strengthen your relationship with one another.  To make the marriage fun and fulfilling.  We learn to be more open with ourselves.  The marriage truly becomes one flesh.  It's all encompassing.  Yes, there's spankings and discipline.  Obedience and submission.  But the love all those things bring together is what makes it work.  At least here.  In the Carlisle Home.  We find love and a whole lot of fun!  We hope you do too.  

--Baker

Oops!  Just realized I published this on Sunday and not Monday.  Please forgive me!

SWAK

So one of the things I have struggled with a lot since I had my stroke 16 months ago is interchanging words.  I have called the sink the fridge.  Or said content instead of consent.  This happens several times a day if not sometimes several times an hour.  It can be very annoying to a words girl like me.  I know this is normal for some, but I struggle with it because it is not normal for me.  I literally am a walking talking goofball some days with word finding adventures left and right.  But a few days ago, I goofed up a word that had us all giggling.

Disclaimer: We do not purposely speak about our children because this blog typically has nothing to do with them.  But today's story is just a funny one.  Our youngest daughter was the culprit in this little story.  And remember this was all in good fun i,e. no children were actually hurt in this post. (Grin😀)

Our daughter was innocently watching TV.  As occasionally our children will do she was actually leaning over the back of the couch, rump stuck out and her chin was resting on her hands.  Why a child could find this particular position comfort is beyond me!  Seriously, this is the last position I would ever think comfortable to rest in.  But, alas there she was in what I would call a spanking position and worse yet one I find myself in all too often!  

I could not help myself.  I walked by and gave her a playful swat on her backside.  It was a bit hard, but it was all in good fun! And she's a spitfire teenager and I knew she would immediately wouldn't have expected her sweet momma!  After all, I'm such an innocent, unsuspecting type of person! Well, she flung her whole body around ready to attack what she assumed was a sibling to find little old me laughing my head off!  Now, I'm sure I saw what I look like when Hoss unexpectedly catches me by surprise!

Now, this child is a particularly good sport.  She laughed and immediately tried to get me back!  I told her that she would need to grow some before thinking she could take on swaking her dear mom.  Yes, here it comes...the snafu in my language.  Yes, I said swaking.  I giggled realizing my mistake.  

She, the sassy child she is, made a silly face and rolled her eyes.  "I think you mean swatting, Mom!"  I seriously wonder where my children get their sassiness from?  Could it possibly be from Hoss?  Hmmm....I'll get back to you on that one!

I rolled my eyes right back at her.  We were enjoying the moment.  She said that there was no such thing as a swaking, but I corrected her.  Who knew this was not in my child's vocabulary.  She was shocked when I said it was a real thing.  I told her next time I would seal it with a kiss!  I then kissed my hand and went in for another swat!  We both ended up giggling as we attempted to avoid one another's swats or swaks.  I think sometimes those little word mix-ups can really be a great taste of normal for all of us!  

So what do you think?  Maybe next time I feel like telling Hoss to "kiss my butt," (teasingly of course) I'll ask him to SWAK me instead!

--Baker

Huggable Spankings?

My man, Hoss, is definitely an interesting and creative guy.  He comes up with interesting and creative ways to spank as well.  I know that many of you find that difficult to believe seeing how calm and laid back he can be about most things.  He is a kind man and he does give yours truly quite a few chances to fix my attitude or get something accomplished in a reasonable amount of time before he reacts.  But folks, there are times when enough is enough and my sweet man, puts his complete alpha male persona on and then watch out because someone is in for a spanking and most likely that someone is me!  

A few days ago Hoss and I were cleaning our bedroom.  This does not happen very often as our room is probably the last room to get a thorough cleaning, but it was one of the things Hoss had on his long list of tasks to get done between Christmas and the New Year.  So he was busy cleaning and I was busy sulking because going through last year's mail was the last thing I wanted to do.  I had other tasks I wanted to do and well I was quickly working myself up into a tizzy.  Why?  Hormones, stress, lack of sleep????  To be quite honest, I have no idea what possessed me to continue to "poke the bear".  We were really both in a good mood, but I was definitely letting the task at hand bring that mood down quickly.

I am not certain what snide remark actually, "broke the camels back," so to speak, but Hoss said something to the effect that he had, had enough and he made a bee line to retrieve Bertha from her special hiding spot.  Now, to Hoss' defense, I was being quite the pill.  He had asked me nicely quite a few times to watch my attitude, but I guess I was not in the mood to heed such sage advice.  I was immediately sobered up and began to ask for a reprieve once I realized he was NOT joking.  Apologies were everywhere.  But my man.  My sweet man.  He was on a mission to remind his wife who was in charge of our marriage.  And ladies if you feel sorry for me, don't.  I deserved everything I was about to get.  Hoss is patient, but his patience has limits too.

Bertha was retrieved and I sat down eyeing him.  This immediate consequence thing was not something I was particularly use to lately.  Definitely since way before I was sick last year.  I sat there until he told me to stand up.  Then I did something equally unheard of.  I said, "No."  He laughed.  We both knew that it really didn't matter what I said.  This was going to happen.  Seeing I was not going to just bend over the bed and accept some well deserved discipline.  I stood up and wrapped my arms around giving my man a huge hug and playfully swatting at him.  I was trying to change the mood and seeing he had laughed, I was hoping that maybe he would put that mean looking bath brush back into the nether regions never to be seen or heard from again.

Now, for those of you who do not know me well or perhaps have not read my blog or for those needing a refresher.  I am not known well for accepting discipline as easily as I should.  I know.  We have been doing this for almost six years but there are days I still fall short in having any sort of natural obedience or submission.  I admit it.  I am not gracefully punished.  I am sometimes spanked with resistance in attitude and actions.   Hoss and I both know this is something that should no longer challenge us, but it does and yes, I've been spanked for it on occasion.

Today though, my delay tactics were not met with the same counter tactics as normal.  There would be no time in the corner or negotiations.  No, today Hoss had the upper hand and I had no idea what I was walking into.  I was trying to apologize and hug it out so to speak.  Hoss hugged me back with one arm effectively pinning me against his body.  The other yielded Bertha with precision that should not be allowable when getting a bear hug from one's man.  I was pinned.  I squirmed.  I wiggled.   I fought to get free.  He hugged me harder and spanked away.  I was stunned.  At a total loss at what to do.  I hugged him harder simply due to not having the ability to push away from him. The thing was I was getting exactly what I deserved for my sour attitude and sass.  I was getting the reset I needed and yet I wasn't fighting against Hoss so much as myself.  I hate to admit when I am wrong and my stubbornness is my downfall in these types of situations I find myself in...

Hoss is talented.  He knew when he had defeated my attitude. The struggled hardly left when he miraculously and mercifully stopped spanking.  I used to need a lot longer spanking to curb my attitude and stubbornness, but now?  Barely a dozen swats and I was a pile of mush.  Maybe we've both grown after all?  He continued hugging me, speaking words of encouragement, but also reminding me he was done with the attitude and snarky remarks.  He released me and put Bertha away. I wiped tears from my eyes with one hand and rubbed my bum with the other.  Once Bertha was secured Hoss gently hugged me again, but this time grabbing both bum cheeks and squeezing them tightly.  "Maybe now, you'll stop when I tell you to stop."  I gently swatted his arm and he laughed.  I love my man's laugh, it's heartfelt and genuine.

Hoss can be so funny sometimes.  He knew that a serious spanking was not needed. He knew I needed a reset more than anything.  He provided it in a gentle (not so gentle) reminder with a hug!

--Baker

PS I have missed being here and have made it my New Year's goal to try and post on Mondays and Thursdays.  Help remind 

Happy 2022!

 

Happy New Year to you all!  We pray you have a blessed year!  

--Hoss and Baker