Sometimes when you are in the middle of something you do not always understand how it can impact your life. Like when we began DD we were just going to give it a try. See how we liked it. See if it even suited us. Hoss was reluctant to even spank at all for discipline when we began. I'm curious how many other HOH's were like that in the beginning, but now fully embrace the lifestyle. I'm also interested on who has tried this lifestyle out and decided it was not for them and why. No shame either way, just curiosity on my end. Anyway, on to today's little memory.
The other day, I came down to our bedroom to see Hoss for some reason or other. He had that silly grin he gets on his face that made me grin back. I love our relationship. It definitely suits us. We may not be very heavy DD like some or as light as others, but how we do marriage fits us well. Now, where exactly was I going with all of this?
Yes, Hoss and his mischievous grin. I walked over to that sweet man and gave him a hug. He hugged me right back. I pulled away and went to grab something out of my purse that was sitting on the bed. I know better. He was too close. Hand and bum connected several times until I was almost out of breath! I tend to hold my breath when he swats though I have no idea why. Hoss finally let me up. I turned around rubbing my bum. That man had a Cheshire cat's grin from ear to ear!
"Are you quite finished?" I said in righteous indignation? (Okay, Okay! I admit it! I loved every second of it! Playful fun and all!)
"I don't think so. I think I've got a lot more where that came from." Hoss said as he came towards me. I backed up, giggling the whole way. He had me pinned against the bedroom door in no time. He wrapped his arms around me and began squeezing my hind cheeks hard. "No, I think, we need some more of this!"
Kissing me hard on the lips I felt ready for anything. That sweet man could have practically did anything and I would have been mush in his hands. He undid my jeans and then and slid my panties down.
"You aren't going anywhere now."
Those words had me. That smile had me. Before I knew it we were having some very nice "exercise." Read sex, but we call it exercise. I cannot exactly remember why, but I'm pretty sure it's because of the kids. It's not like we can outright say, "Mom and Dad need to go have sex now, you run along..." can we?
Now, these are the types of things people who are not in this lifestyle do not understand about DD. This is what it's about. It's not just discipline and spanking and corner time. It's not all about rules and consequences or always about submission and obedience. Though it is also about those things, just not always. It's about using this tool to strengthen your relationship with one another. To make the marriage fun and fulfilling. We learn to be more open with ourselves. The marriage truly becomes one flesh. It's all encompassing. Yes, there's spankings and discipline. Obedience and submission. But the love all those things bring together is what makes it work. At least here. In the Carlisle Home. We find love and a whole lot of fun! We hope you do too.
--Baker
Oops! Just realized I published this on Sunday and not Monday. Please forgive me!
Hi Baker, I so love this! There is definitely a fun side to DD, or any type of spanking relationship. I know we have had many similar episodes over the years.
ReplyDeleteWe started out with spanking for fun and as part of erotic play then decided we wanted something that would spill over to other areas of life and started a DD relationship. Our dynamic has gone through many changes over the years, including elements of Daddy/lg.
We haven't had an active dynamic for some years now. Ultimately I think we struggled with rules and discipline etc. Nowadays any spanky action is again purely for fun.
Having said that, we gained much from our DD relationship, such as greater intimacy and communication and these benefits have remained a part of our relationship.
Hugs
Roz
Roz, I love how your story, too, has evolved over the years. I know you guys have found your way figuring out what DD is for you. Thanks for sharing your journey with us! You are definitely a supportive friend and commenter.
Delete--Baker
ReplyDeleteWe gave it a good try for nearly ten years. But we no longer try. It never suited Nick to do ANY discipline. All he wanted was a fun sex game. There is nothing wrong with that at all – but I wanted, needed, craved more. I couldn’t enjoy the light side without the discipline side. I know Nick loves me. But it felt like he didn’t really care. I miss it. But I decided I couldn’t keep trying. It hurt too much. We’re happy and we get along fine but I still feel like there could have been so much more.
Hey, PK, I think that a lot of relationships are that way. Your Nick loves you greatly, but you are right, this is a certain type of love that comes from this type of relationship. It would definitely hurt me if we had to quit and almost did have to quit after my stroke due to the blood thinners. It is something each couple has to explore carefully to see what works for them. I believe you can live vicariously through Cassie to some degree, even though that is not the exact same thing. Hugs,
Delete--Baker
I wanted to add that many of your readers live vicariously through Cassie as well.
Delete--Baker
When I started reading this I thought to myself I have nothing to share cause we don't do DD or have I ever done it. BUT the bit at the end - how what we do /however we identify - brings an intimacy that can't be beat (in my opinion). We have many lil moments that make us giggle (and yes Sir Steve does giggle in a manly sort of way) ....... like when I answer him "yes sir no sir 3 bags full sir"..... or when I call him my "lord and master" that always brings about a swat or two (he HATES honorifics)
ReplyDeleteI find our relationship makes me feel safe and loved and so connected AND so worth the work!
Morningstar, everyone has something to add while here. It's not a matter of if it relates perfectly to DD, because there is no such thing as perfect DD. You guys do you. I love that you feel safe and connected. It definitely is worth all that work!
Delete--Baker