I often ponder my purpose in Blogland. I have asked myself these questions (and probably many more) over the last few months as I try to sort out my feelings about blogging and Blogland in general. I know this is more of a reflective, internal evaluation of myself, but I also feel other bloggers and maybe readers will be able to view this and consider some of the questions for themselves.
Come on, follow me down the rabbit hole or labyrinth, whichever you prefer to call it. Right now, I'm calling it a bit of a maze my brain feels the need to travel down.
I guess the main question is rooted in the following.
Why come here and blog? Isn't this whole spanking thing suppose to be private and personal? I mean this lifestyle is something most of us hide from everyone close to us in our real lives. Why share it with strangers or anyone for that matter?
I'm trying to figure this out and answer it. It's maybe not so much the why as it what purpose do I feel writing about our lifestyle meets. I originally came to make friends. Check that box! I've done that aplenty. Even been able to make me a few "not friends" in the process. I've made my way through and found those whose lives are, in some cases, quite a bit like ours and I've also found friends who are so vastly different but so accepting. Some are older, a few are younger or close to my age. All are kind, generous people, who, like Hoss and I, are on a journey to nurture our marriage in an unconventional way. Those are the friends I've kept close. I learn a lot from each dynamic, each perspective, but I no longer need blogging to make friends. There's always room for more friends, but it's not my sole purpose for blogging any longer. Question is... do I need it for other reasons?
Those thoughts lead me to the next questions.
Is there a point to sharing our story? In other words, does blogging serve a purpose in our lives? Are we educating anyone around us or is it simply a journal? A log of our journey?
Mostly, I think there is a point. It's just sometimes I struggle to find what others would find so interesting. I've spoken to other bloggers and I believe that many wrestle with the idea that what they have to say is important. I wonder if sometimes that is why I've stayed out of the picture for so long. It's easier not to come back, even if I want to. Because then I feel the responsibility to blog often and blog well. I also love to entertain while I write. I do not want to bore anyone. I just want to show that even at this busy stage in our lives that we, too, can have a DD lifestyle. That it isn't relegated to those couples without children or those whose children are grown. I believe we all want to show that Blogland is a place of diversity. That all are welcome regardless of what stage of life they are in. That each has a place or a purpose. We are all educating others through using our lives as an example to many. We show there is no right or wrong way to live this lifestyle.
Do others out there actually learn anything from us? Maybe...at least I hope so. I'm just never sure. I mean, seriously, folks. I know each of us wants to make an impact here. Whether the blog is for journaling or just to connect with others or to process their journey. I think all of us want to have an impact. I'm just not always certain if the impact is the one I want to make. I know I can be very silly and perhaps even witty at times, but I do take our lifestyle very seriously. If I don't, I know my sweet man will remind me too!
Maybe a further idea or question would follow along these particular lines:
Does this journey make sense to anyone besides Hoss or me? Do we have a particular place in the land that represents a certain type of people? Maybe...but I think everyone is welcome.
I like to think our journey is different than others in Blogland. We have many children, I stay at home, my husband works more than most, we are busy outside of just those factors. I think it's our journey. I feel the blog reflects that, but does it make sense to others. I often wonder if anyone else gets anything out of what I post. Some days it does not make sense even to us why we try so hard to make this work, except the benefits, are so great. I mean the closeness, the beauty of it all, the intense love we feel for one another. We just pray we are using the blog that in a way that shows others all sides of the story. That we are not sugar coating that it can be rough, but that it is rewarding as well.
I guess to go along with an earlier question/concept about blogging...
Does it help having friends in Blogland and if so what purpose do they serve?
I have very good friends here in Blogland. People I trust. I could be just as happy just chatting with them without showing up and writing here. I wanted to actually blog to make friends. I needed the support. I have that now, but somehow blogging still feels important. That there are others out there that may want to be encouraged, that are situations similar to us. Raising children. Trying to remain deeply committed to one another. Enriching our marriage. But the friendships, folks, if you do not have a friend from this community I can not emphasize the value that person can bring. The wisdom. The insight. The encouragement. The honesty. The ability to commiserate when one is facing or has just faced the barn burner of their lives....That is simply priceless.
So, I guess all I've done is simply spilled my guts out for all of you to view. What is that saying, the good, the bad and the ugly? Well, today, I kind of shared all of that with all of you. I think a big part of me just wants our journey is something that someone else can see that this can be done. That we're not the only ones going through this process with kids and work and all the stuff that makes our days pass by. That maybe we are having an impact, no matter how small, on the world around us. I guess, that's probably what everyone else desires too. That they have come here, to this place, and made a difference.