Wednesday, February 6, 2019


This will be a quick post as I'm really just going to ask a few questions and let you all do the work!  I do like the idea of being lazy in a post, but not on this particular issue.
Hoss asked me this morning what to do about DD.  Now, this is an odd question to come out of my sweet man's mouth, but the dilemma is real and one we've always struggled with during our DD lifestyle.  So I'm going to propose the question to all of you and see what insight we may glean from your comments.
Due to my asthma, there are often times when I become sick easier than the average person and my colds/symptoms/asthma flare-ups will result in me being sick far longer than the average person.  The problem is huge when it comes to the spanking issue as when I cannot breathe it's unfair for Hoss to spank.  Does that mean my mouth knows when to stop or that I do not struggle in other areas?  Yes!  Just kidding, because I would not have written this post if I was a complete angel when I am sick, would I? 
So the basic premise for this post is that we are looking for other alternatives that Hoss can use that would help us when he cannot spank.

So start typing, folks, Hoss we really want to know what are some other corrections out there that can be "implemented" without spanking that have worked for you!

Thanks, ahead of time (I think), I know Hoss will definitely appreciate it!

Sunday, February 3, 2019


I often ponder my purpose in Blogland.  I have asked myself these questions (and probably many more) over the last few months as I try to sort out my feelings about blogging and Blogland in general.  I know this is more of a reflective, internal evaluation of myself, but I also feel other bloggers and maybe readers will be able to view this and consider some of the questions for themselves. 
Come on, follow me down the rabbit hole or labyrinth, whichever you prefer to call it.  Right now, I'm calling it a bit of a maze my brain feels the need to travel down.

I guess the main question is rooted in the following. 
Why come here and blog?  Isn't this whole spanking thing suppose to be private and personal?  I mean this lifestyle is something most of us hide from everyone close to us in our real lives.  Why share it with strangers or anyone for that matter? 
I'm trying to figure this out and answer it.  It's maybe not so much the why as it what purpose do I feel writing about our lifestyle meets.  I originally came to make friends.  Check that box!  I've done that aplenty.  Even been able to make me a few "not friends" in the process.  I've made my way through and found those whose lives are, in some cases, quite a bit like ours and I've also found friends who are so vastly different but so accepting.   Some are older, a few are younger or close to my age.  All are kind, generous people, who, like Hoss and I, are on a journey to nurture our marriage in an unconventional way.  Those are the friends I've kept close.  I learn a lot from each dynamic, each perspective, but I no longer need blogging to make friends. There's always room for more friends, but it's not my sole purpose for blogging any longer.  Question is... do I need it for other reasons?

Those thoughts lead me to the next questions.

Is there a point to sharing our story?  In other words, does blogging serve a purpose in our lives?  Are we educating anyone around us or is it simply a journal?  A log of our journey?  
Mostly, I think there is a point.  It's just sometimes I struggle to find what others would find so interesting.  I've spoken to other bloggers and I believe that many wrestle with the idea that what they have to say is important.  I wonder if sometimes that is why I've stayed out of the picture for so long.  It's easier not to come back, even if I want to.  Because then I feel the responsibility to blog often and blog well.  I also love to entertain while I write.  I do not want to bore anyone.  I just want to show that even at this busy stage in our lives that we, too, can have a DD lifestyle.  That it isn't relegated to those couples without children or those whose children are grown.  I believe we all want to show that Blogland is a place of diversity.  That all are welcome regardless of what stage of life they are in.  That each has a place or a purpose.  We are all educating others through using our lives as an example to many.  We show there is no right or wrong way to live this lifestyle.
Do others out there actually learn anything from us? least I hope so.  I'm just never sure.  I mean, seriously, folks.  I know each of us wants to make an impact here.  Whether the blog is for journaling or just to connect with others or to process their journey.  I think all of us want to have an impact.  I'm just not always certain if the impact is the one I want to make.  I know I can be very silly and perhaps even witty at times, but I do take our lifestyle very seriously.  If I don't, I know my sweet man will remind me too!
Maybe a further idea or question would follow along these particular lines:

Does this journey make sense to anyone besides Hoss or me?  Do we have a particular place in the land that represents a certain type of people?  Maybe...but I think everyone is welcome.
I like to think our journey is different than others in Blogland.  We have many children, I stay at home, my husband works more than most, we are busy outside of just those factors.  I think it's our journey.  I feel the blog reflects that, but does it make sense to others.  I often wonder if anyone else gets anything out of what I post.  Some days it does not make sense even to us why we try so hard to make this work, except the benefits, are so great.  I mean the closeness, the beauty of it all, the intense love we feel for one another.  We just pray we are using the blog that in a way that shows others all sides of the story.  That we are not sugar coating that it can be rough, but that it is rewarding as well.

I guess to go along with an earlier question/concept about blogging...
Does it help having friends in Blogland and if so what purpose do they serve?

I have very good friends here in Blogland.  People I trust.  I could be just as happy just chatting with them without showing up and writing here.  I wanted to actually blog to make friends.  I needed the support.  I have that now, but somehow blogging still feels important.  That there are others out there that may want to be encouraged, that are situations similar to us.  Raising children.  Trying to remain deeply committed to one another.  Enriching our marriage.  But the friendships, folks, if you do not have a friend from this community I can not emphasize the value that person can bring.  The wisdom.  The insight.  The encouragement.  The honesty.  The ability to commiserate when one is facing or has just faced the barn burner of their lives....That is simply priceless.

So, I guess all I've done is simply spilled my guts out for all of you to view.  What is that saying, the good, the bad and the ugly?  Well, today, I kind of shared all of that with all of you.  I think a big part of me just wants our journey is something that someone else can see that this can be done.  That we're not the only ones going through this process with kids and work and all the stuff that makes our days pass by.  That maybe we are having an impact, no matter how small, on the world around us.  I guess, that's probably what everyone else desires too.  That they have come here, to this place, and made a difference.


Thursday, January 31, 2019

Mr. Owl...How Many Licks?

The other night I was reading Nora Jean's post to Hoss without telling him the name of the implement she was complaining about until the very end.  See Nora Jean's post here:  //  When I showed him the picture he smiled and thought her husband had made an excellent choice in purchasing that particular implement.  You see, Hoss has an affinity for bath brushes.  It was one of our first choices as our local Wally World sold them for a good price and it was something that could, if we chose, left out without odd questions from the children.  So Nora Jean's post brought a smile to my man's face and a laugh when I read him her comment.  To point out a bit of discrepancy.  Our bath brush is more of a bath sponge, but as I pointed out to Hoss the part that swats is the same.
Then Hoss' smile widened and he asked me a question that had me wondering the same thing.  How many swats had dear Bertha, our christened bath brush, bestowed on my posterior?  Seeing this particular implement has been around for almost our entire DD relationship I begged to pardon maybe instead of figuring that out we should just retire her.  That got me nothing, but a dirty look from Hoss.  So I played along and suggested several tens of thousands of swats.  He smiled and suggested Bertha had a bit more to give.  Ugh! 🤣😂 That man!

The next words out of his mouth we're to suggest I post about our discussion.  So here you have it.  Bertha gets her own post!  Again!

So what do you all figure is your lovely spouse's favorite implement and how many swats do you think it's endured?
I contend that it's the age old question of how many licks to get to get to the Tootsie roll center of a Tootsie Pop.  You know the old commercial when the boy asks the wise old owl that question.  And the owl answers three? Well, I think the owl got it right.  By the third lick I'm usually done.  Done with Bertha.  Done with spanking.  Done with pretty much everything.  But Hoss insists on more.  When it's all over....that's when I agree that this is all worth it.  The during...not so much.  I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels that way.

So I'm curious what is each couple's go to implement and how much use does it get?  Is your number the magical three or a hundred?  Also how long have you had it?  If it's his/her hand you can skip that question, lol!  Is it your favorite or dreaded implement?  Share your beloved implement's history.


PS: This is our 100th post.  That's kind of exciting to us!

Monday, January 28, 2019


Hoss has a word for 2019.

Bet you cannot guess what it is...
The word is consistency.

It's almost like a new mantra.

He uses it by itself. Saying it slowly as if I might not understand.

He uses it in sentences.

Consistency is our new word, sweetheart.

We must have consistency to make DD work.

Consistency makes the whole house run smoothly.

Maintenance every night is one way to show consistency.

I smile at him.

I also shake my head.

He smiles back.

He means it when he says consistency.

It floats right off his tongue like it's magic or something.

Hoss will say it with a slightly different tone.

In this tone, he's referring to how I should also find consistency.
You need to be consistent.

You need to remember the need for consistency.

I agree.

I need to be more consistent.

I need him to be consistent.

I want him to be consistent.

I thrive on it.

It makes me feel secure.

I also know that when he is consistent, I feel his love.

You know what I also feel?


That word consistency also has a new meaning.

It means Bertha's going to be consistently biting me in the butt!

Consistently yours,


Friday, January 25, 2019

What Do You Get In Trouble For?

I know...I know... it's really none of my business.  But I'm so curious I cannot stand it.  This is all Amy's fault.  She started it.  I promise you.  We have been having this lovely little conversation about what our men spank for and what they do not believe in spanking for and thus...a post is born.
She has a way of doing that to me....  Making me think and all.  I'm not a particular fan of overthinking, well, maybe I do..I really should think on that some more.
Anyway, that is not what this post is about (it's not about overthinking in other words). It's all about what do you get in trouble for?  As in what makes your man (or woman in some cases) feel he needs to take you in hand?  What lights the fire in his eyes or the twinkle?  What pushes him to want to reset your fanny?  Is it your mouth, a sly look, a rule that you did not follow?  So many possibilities.
Now, for a great many of you who do this for fun, meaning it's a playful part of your relationship, do you ever find yourself on the receiving end of a little harder than normal swat due to something you said?  Or maybe, he knows you like to be spanked hard, so he gives you those feathery brushes with a flogger that drive you mad?
For those who do resets, what constitutes the need?  Do you have to shout out that you need one or does he notice your kindness slipping, your words becoming harsher?  What motivates him to say enough is enough?
Now, what about those who are more into DD like Hoss and I are?  Does it take breaking a rule, smarting off, being outright defiant (pretty sure on that one, but you never know).  Here it takes losing my temper at him or forgetting my check ins (those little buggers sneak up on me some days even with my trusty alarm set).  It could also be that I'm really short tempered and instead of venting lose it rapidly on him.  Maybe it has to with me being so overwhelmed and I just need something to bring me down to earth and calm me down.  He reads me, that man of mine, and I love him for it.  The rules... I have a love hate relationship with those, but that's okay...I want them and he knows I need them to function to be the best me I can be.

What does he not spank for or why wouldn't he spank?

When I need to be held because I feel I'm failing.

When I am sick and he needs to care for me and make me feel better.

When I feel lonely and need his touch.

When I am vulnerable or weak.

When he messes up.

When I'm sassy and teasing and playful....unless I cross a line...he says he loves me sassy.

Those are just a few reasons...I'm certain there are more, but than I'd have to do some more thinking, and well, who knows what other posts would be birthed out of that...ugh!
What about those in more of a d/s relationship?  Those roles are more likely to be tighter defined would be my guess, but are there things he would definitely spank for and others he would ignore?  Does he always spank or are there other ways he makes you feel submissive or in the right head space?  Can you get away with playful teasing or being downright sarcastic?
These are just ideas and thoughts floating around in my head.  Thanks, alot, Amy...geez woman as if I don't have enough stuff wandering around up there trying to work their way around that maze of a brain of mine!  (Just in jest people, Amy, has a wicked sense of humor, too.)

So, my challenge to all of you out there is to encourage you to share what gets you in trouble, but even more what does he not spank for?


Wednesday, January 23, 2019

Balancing Act

It's no news, to anyone who reads here frequently, that Hoss and I busy folks.  We have several children and many moving parts in our day due to the logistics of a raising a large family as well as Hoss working a highly demanding job.  We make DD work partly because we badly want it in our lives and it helps our marriage run smoother, we are happier since adding it, and feel it overall benefits us during this season of our lives.

One of the main questions we get from our nosy neighbors awesome fellow bloggers or sweet readers is how do we possibly make this work?
Well, to answer that would be difficult simply because each day is so incredibly different, but I can say that if you want something badly enough, you will go to great lengths to make it happen.  So let me try to give you all an idea on how we make it work without being too nutso by sharing too much personal info.

Do the kids know?  I mean be realistic, Baker.  The kids have to know, right?

Nope!  Did your kids know about your sex life?  Um, I'd surely hope not.  Do ours know.  Nope!  So can you hide spankings from the kids?  Yup!!!
How do you hide the sound?

Hello!  I know lots of you have Alexis in your homes and she can really get her groove on with some 80s music with a beat.  Hoss loves a good beat.  What HOH doesn't? Also none of our kids are morning people, so early morning works well.  Late nights also can be equally used even with teens still awake, but in a different part if the house if the music is loud.  And Hoss always listens to his music loudly, so no news there.
Don't you cry or yell during a spanking?

I'm not a crier by nature, but I do make some noise.  I've eaten enough pillow fluff the last few years to stuff a Billy goat full, if you know what I mean.

Do the kids see Hoss as being in charge?

Most definitely unless I'm not setting a good example.  Which, um, happens too frequently to count never ever happens.  😉 Actually they do know I defer to him, but I'm here most often and there's tons of decisions made every day, so most of those are mine to make.  Hoss doesn't want or need to be  bothered with what they had for breakfast as long as they ate.  Those types of things.
Do you call him sir?

Where we live using sir or ma'am is not necessarily unheard of, but I don't call him sir in front of them unless I'm being snarky.  Same with using, "Aye,Aye Captain," or "Whatever you say, your royal Highness!". What?  You guys didn't think I just have a sense of humor here, right?  Nope, I'm pretty sassy as a general rule of thumb.🤣

How does Hoss let you know you're in trouble without letting on to the kids what's going on?

There's a few ways that work.  One, is simply suggesting I need break.  He might say, "Sweetheart, you look tired.  Why don't you go down stairs for a bit".

(Stop laughing those of you who know me!  I know you guys know I run on various statements on my particular exhaustion level for any given day.  That's just Baker talk for I never sleep!  So move along people,nothing more to see here!) .  Well, I do sleep, but it's on an as needed basis and well, enough said.
Or he'll give me a look and when our eyes meet I know I've stepped too far.
My favorite response so far is Cat's horrible lovely suggestion of him scratching his palm.  Think itchy palm syndrome.   Thanks, Cat for that one, I owe you one, my friend!  Big-time!
So those are some interesting questions we've got over the last two years.  Probably more than some of you cared to know.😆.   I'd love to hear more suggestions from the rest of you out there practicing ttwd with kids, or family members etc living with you.  If no one else is at home, but the two of you, than feel free comment as you see fit.

Have a great week!

Wednesday, December 5, 2018

The Great Cookie Exchange

Hear ye! Hear ye!  It's that time again for the Great Cookie Exchange!  I know that I have not been around as much as I would like, but if there's one thing that can get me blogging is brand spanking new recipes!  (Had to get spanking in there somehow!)  So I dug around the old recipe cards in the box and came up with two that are very new recipes to our family.  Now, the dilemma set in on which to use.  I'd recently looked these recipes up and even on my first go, I Baker-tized them!  Folks, I'm just not that good at following a recipe...even the very first time.  Thankfully, Hoss, has sort of kind of grown accustomed to my ability to improvise and therefore I bring ye the top two recipes of the fall season (at least at our house)!
German Peppernuts or Pfeffernusse (this is not my sister's recipe)  The kids and I made this for a class project not too long ago and it makes tons of these little German cookies.  They smell divine and I would NOT double this unless you want to make a ton!  We made the mistake of doubling it, because with a ton of kids cookies do not last long at all.  Well, in this case they did!
German Peppernut (Pfeffernusse) Recipe

1 cup softened butter (two sticks)
1 1/4 cups white sugar
1 cup molasses
1 egg
4 cups all purpose flour
1 tablespoon anise seed
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon salt

Mix together butter, sugar, molasses and egg until well blended.  Mix the rest of the ingredients in a separate bowl.  Add to molasses mixture until flour can no longer be seen.   Roll out the dough to about 1 inch thick log (makes cutting them much faster and makes them round not square).  Refrigerate for an hour.  Before baking cut into one inch squares.  Bake at 350 degrees for 9-10 minutes.  You want the tops to be lightly browned as this is meant to be a crisp cookie.

Our second recipe is truly a brand new one for me.  I have not made Key Lime Pie in ages and really wanted one for Thanksgiving.  This recipe was one I just had to share because it truly is a rich and creamy pie and one that Hoss and our oldest daughter fell in love with and will now be a favorite forever.
Key Lime Pie (for two pies)

Two premade graham cracker crusts (or make your own)

3 cans sweetened condensed milk
1 cup sour cream
1/3 cup of lime juice
1/2 cup of lemon juice
3 tablespoons lime zest

Preheat oven to 359 degrees.

Mix together sweeten condensed milk, sour cream, lemon juice, lime juice and lime zest.   Pour into the graham cracker pie crust.  Bake for 5-6 minutes until tiny pinhole sized bubbles burst on the surface of the pie.  You are not trying to brown the pie, just bake it to set.  Chill pie and serve with whipped cream.

Seriously the creamiest key lime pie I have ever tasted.  It is a light lime flavor, not overly powering.
Other participants of the Great Cookie Exchange are listed below!

I do hope you all enjoy these recipes as much as we do!

Much love,
Baker and Hoss