Monday, November 25, 2019

Growth

When Hoss and I started DD, just like many others, I did all the research before bringing the idea to him.  We started slow.  Hoss had given me one resounding swat during some mighty fine loving and he said the look on my face of surprise was all he needed to know that I was shocked, but curiously interested.  A short time later, I asked him to spank me one night while we were engaging in some "extracurricular exercise," in our room.  We have since added discipline, maintenance, resets, etc. to our repertoire.  We've grown, stretched, had set back, reevaluated every aspect of this since the very beginning.  There has been as many growths as steps backs and we have learned many things of value that have helped us become closer and earn greater trust in one another over the past three and a half years.
Over the weekend, Hoss and I had done some talking and I would like to open that discussion up here.  I know that many of you have been in a TTWD, DD, D/S relationship and some have tried one of the dynamics and then decided it was not for you or your loved one.  Others of you are still in that place where you are researching and searching for answers to why and what and who and the other myriad of questions we all have asked ourselves before.  Well, during our discussion I asked Hoss the question, "How did you known this was the right thing for us?"  and maybe more detailed, "How did you know it would work?"  His answer was simple, but heartfelt as he often is, "I saw that spark in your eye, and I knew we were onto something."
I often ponder over how this has evolved into Hoss often being more willing to spank than I am to receive said spanking.  I love his answer to this thought as well, "I know it works, I know how it makes you feel.  I see how it helps us."  I love that it is all about us.  That little word says so much.  It means so much.  It also must be noted that Hoss feels like when DD is at it's most prevalent that I am most willing to hear him, to truly listen to him, and that is what makes things feel so right.
I say these things because they continue to amaze me.  Not to say we are better or worse than any other couple out there.  We are just doing our own thing and trying to learn every day what would bring us closer together.  I reflect often of where we were and where we are now.   I am curious of the following things though about you all as well.

So without further ado feel free to answer all or just some of the questions or feel free to just say, "Hi," so I know you stopped in.

1. How do you feel your relationship has changed or grown or evolved since adding spanking to your relationship?

2. Do you feel your spouse as changed or grown as much as you have or less or the same or differently?

3.  What was your spouse's initial response to adding this whole spanking thing into your relationship?

4.  Has spanking improved things and if so, how so?

I know we all blog about a lot of different aspects of spanking, but these are just a few of the thoughts I ponder when I think about spanking.  And I often wonder what others responses would be.  Feel free to share.  No judgments made here, just interest and curiosity.  Thanks for stopping in!

--Baker

8 comments:

  1. We sadly no longer practice TTWD. Nick would continue the fun, playful side but that was just a tiny side line for me. I had to have some realism for it to be meaningful. Without that I had no interest. But we are closer than before I came out to him. I'm most grateful that he was willing to try. The closeness stayed.

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    1. I understand, PK, it would be so hard for me to just enjoy the playful side. Thankful the closeness stayed for you. That's awesome!
      --Baker

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  2. Sir Steve and I don't do D/D or HFH - we're much more D/s. We found each other many years ago when we were both looking for 'play' partners (play did not include sex - it involved whips and paddles and knives oh my!)

    In our case this Dr Seuss quote explains it pretty well
    “We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”

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    1. That's cool to learn more about you, MS! Very interesting to hear what brought you to this!
      --Baker

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  3. What a lovely post Baker. I so love Hoss's response to your questions.

    While we haven't practiced ttwd in a long time now (although having said that, we did 'play' for the first time in forever last weekend:) through ttwd we became much closer, more intimate and our communication improved ten fold. I also think we both gained more confidence in other areas of life. Many of those benefits still remain.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Aw, a play session, how fun for you two! Thanks for enjoying the post!
      --Baker

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  4. i am a true spanko married to a plain vanilla equals no spankings but i love reading about your adventures in spankingland.

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    1. Anon, Thanks for sharing. I think a lot of people come here to visit and I love that you called it spankingland. I enjoy hearing that!
      --Baker

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