Alexa, Stay Out Of THIS!

I recently purchased Hoss a fun new gift.  I was promised by two friends that he would love it!  I am not a techie, gadgety sort of girl at all, so I just took a leap of faith here, people, that my man would love it.  Hoss did love the gift of an amazon echo by the lovely little name of Alexa.

....wait...what...some of you do not know what an Alexa is?  Well, let me inform you.  Alexa is a little computer doohickey that is determined to prove she knows everything!  Weather?  she's got you covered.  News?  she knows exactly what is going on where and even knows my husband's preferences on where he hears his news.  Sports?  she knows exactly who beat who in the preseason as well as who's up for draft, who's been injured, etc.  you name it, she knows it.  In other words she's a busy-body-know-it-all who likes to meddle in things.

Which leads me to my post.  She knows songs.  Did you know Alexa will sing to you or play you her favorite songs?  Do you know that the day Aretha Franklin passed away that Alexa's favorite song that day was RESPECT.  Yeah, she also knows how to play 80s music like nobody's business.

Need a little early morning spanking music...she's got you covered...well, in this case Hoss covered.  It's just her choice of music that has me wondering if she's got some sort of Supergirl perception on what Hoss needs and when.

Now, now, now, you all think Baker is overreacting, don't you?  Well, for once you, folks, are wrong.  DEAD WRONG!

I am not overreacting! Last week we were up early getting ready to have a little bit of spanking action.  I was in a teeny tiny bit of trouble (STOP LAUGHING!  teeny tiny bits of trouble do happen around here)....anyway...Hoss had me over the bed and as it was creeping close to the time a few kiddos may have been waking up he said, "Alexa, play 80s music."  Alexa pops on and starts playing this song.  It starts slow, but literally one of the first lines in the song was about hitting your mark.   Seriously, Alexa, the man has NO PROBLEM hitting his mark!  He's actually extremely good at it...regardless if I want him to be or not.  You'd think he'd occasionally miss and hit the bed once in a while, nope, not him.  UGH!

So we heard the hit the mark and both dissolved into giggles thinking Alexa had really picked a good one for that one.  Haha, Alexa!  right? Maybe....

The next day we are getting ready for a little reset type of spanking and well, Hoss repeats the phrase, "Alexa, play 80s music."  Well, you know what that She-Devil decides to play?

Nah, not going to tell you....too embarrassing....

Wait...I got distracted...that's what this post is about.

You really do want to hear what she did to me, don't you?

Geez, nosy bunch of people!

She decides to play Pat Benatar's, "Hit me with your best shot!"

Now, I"m sorry....that's just not funny.  I tell you she's got this thing about reading my man's mind!  Wait....maybe he's pre-programmed her to respond that way?  Wait?  Can he do that?  I have no idea...remember...I'm not tech savvy at all.  Can he do that?  I'll have to ask.

Because I'm almost certain after today's spanking Alexa either has it in for me or Hoss is being very clever!  Today Hoss says, "Alexa, play 80s music."  Things were moving along rather nicely.

That did not mean Alexa had to play Billy Joel's, "We Didn't Start the Fire."  No, thank you very much!  Hoss did a fine job without her input!

--Baker